Taoism. I have decided to become an Egotarian. I figure that's appropriate, since I'm the only member.Egotarianism is based on whatever I say is true. I don't need a holy book because I'm it. I don't need a doctrine because I'm it. I don't need a creed or a ritual or a canon or a sacrament or a cathedral ... Scratch that. I'd like you to build me a big church with, say, seven bedrooms, ten baths, and an indoor swimming pool. Yeah. Religion is a pretty cool thing!Based on the history of the religions of the world, I can now claim to be tax exempt. I can excuse my children from public school classes that I don't agree with. I can have my own vestments if I want. New shoes! I plan to spend every Sunday—No. Friday night. Why would I want to get up on Sunday morning?—every Friday night in my own little pulpit in a miniskirt. My pulpit will move around to all the best dance venues.I can lobby congress for special exemptions from military service, political service, foreign service, and any. “Well I wouldn’t quite say it like that. It’s more like it allows you to connect with others and become one with all of mankind, and from that, you gain complete understanding of who you are. Think of other people as like maps of your brain, each one inaccurate in some way. However, if you take all those maps and figure out which parts are true, then you understand the build of your subconscious. Now, I believe we should call this a day.Tomorrow, you will all reach the final step and discover your Selves, I promise.” ------------------------------------------------------Jack’s apostles lay in their beds, unable to fall asleep. Their minds were all buzzing, wondering what it would feel like when they discovered their Selves, as well as wondering if it was really going to happen. Jack had guaranteed that they would all succeed tomorrow, but was it really possible for people to have such a drastic metamorphosis in just twenty days? And on Friday, they would get the answers that they had.
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